A childhood love pattern from What Did You Learn About Love Growing Up?
Love Was Conditional on Being Easy
The love you experienced early was real, but it came with fine print. Be good. Be helpful. Don't be too much. Don't need too much. You learned to earn your place in relationships by being the version of yourself that caused the least disruption.
What this costs you now
You are still, in some rooms, performing the version of yourself that feels safest. Still shrinking before anyone asks you to. The exhausting part is that you do it automatically now, before you even realize you're doing it.
What wants to change
Your needs are not a burden. The people worth keeping will not leave because you take up space. The work is learning to test that belief slowly, in safe relationships, until your nervous system actually believes it.
Three journal prompts for Love Was Conditional on Being Easy
- What parts of you felt too much for the people who raised you?
- When do you still try to be easy so you won't be left?
- Write a letter to your younger self giving her permission to be a lot.
Want thirty more?
Pages for You is a 30-day journal written only for you, around what you're carrying right now. One page a day, at your own pace.
Or start small
Printables from my Etsy shop, Innershelfstudio, picked for Love Was Conditional on Being Easy. Instant download.